1) Boris Yeltsin fired his government. It was either a carefully calculated last minute move to ward off his own impeachment or he was drunk. You be the judge!

1b) The last joke in Spanish: Boris Yeltsin encendi— su gobierno. Era o un movimiento minucioso pasado cuidadosamente calculado guardar de su propia acusaci—n o lo bebieron. Usted sea el juez!

2) Star Wars: Episode One finally opened in North America. Some comments from movie goers leaving the cinema on opening day included:

• "The Special effects were great"
• "The best movie ever!"
• "I waited 3 months and I still got that annoying seat right down the front"
• "I used the force and pre-booked my tickets"
• "I'm a nerd. I use nerd power. Bow wow wow"
• "Some guy threw out half a tub of popcorn. Can you believe that? Some people. Waste not. Want not. Am I right?" (munch munch munch).
• "The official Annikan Skywalker jumbo soft drink and popcorn was only $121.80"
• "I can't believe the boat sunk and Leo died!"
• "I purposefully stayed in the bath for 18 days so I'd look like Yoda for tonight"
• "My favourite movie entitled Episode One: The Phantom Menace... ever!"
• "Yeah. Obi-wan-his-money-back"

3) American television distributor Warner Brothers is experimenting with new forms of advertising in it's television programming. The most noticable new form is "virtual product placement" where product names or likenesses are digitally inserted into the show using advanced computer graphic techniques. Here's an example of it's use on an upcoming episode of the hit show "Friends".

4) Indonesia is going CARARARA CRAZY.

5) After a lifetime in South African politics, Nelson Mandela is retiring later this year. His excuse: "I just can't get jiggy with it like that Billy Bob Clinton can". He was speaking French at the time so he said: "Je juste ne puis pas devenir jiggy avec lui aime que bidon de Billy Bob Clinton. "

6) The New South Wales Drug Summit reached some controversial recommendations in Australia late last month. It's conclusions included:

• 1) Fred Nile is an old fart.
  That is all.

7) Also in Australia, the Australian Senate passed controversial legislation requiring the Internet be Censored. Although censoring the internet is physically impossible, as well as costing hundreds of millions of dollars, the senate believe they have powers greater than that of mortal men. Next week they are having a staff picnic on the moon. La La La.

8) Also while talking about the Australian Senate, after seeing an exclusive showing of the controversial movie "Lolita" they have requested several more movie screenings. "The Matrix" and "Star Wars: Episode One" topped the list. However, it appears as though "Mary Poppins" and "Dr. Doolittle" (the original) will be shown, because Brian Harradine has the balance of power and hence wages more power than everyone else in Australian government combined.

9) Although assassinated over thirty years ago, Robert F. Kennedy is the subject of a new in-depth biography, published by Harper-Collins.